The four stories in Rhydian Thomas' debut novel Milk Island take place on the eponymous public-private-partnership island in 2023. In the following non-sequential excerpt, a new inmate to Milk Island starts talking to the digital avatar of Billy T James from his cell's interactive bunk.

Read our conversation with Karen Healey and Rhydian Thomas about speculative fiction, escapism, and why literary fiction can be so fucking boring.

They said You could try speaking
So I’m speaking
Speaking Quietly Saying
This is everything Nothing
Whispering into the walls
Who’s there And
Are you listening

* * *

Callouses blisters bruises lumps tears sores burns and pocks
Milk skin blood and cum seeping night screaming wanking sick
disgusting spectre of a human Fuck
Save me Billy
Teach me to hit harder Work faster Make this corpse a
fortress Teach me to weave and not lose a leg when I’m
throwing the big ones Make my elbows strong with dragon skin
and dagger point to cut these fuckers open Make me more
methodical on the job Make me a solid worker Let me own
the clock Buy the hours Listen Just listen
Let’s remember all those songs I want to hear every beat again
Listen
Billy T James is my best Mate He goes oi look at this
Oi look at this cuzzy The background on the screen changes and
he’s in a bar He walks to the bartender and says play my boy
here a song ok? The bartender is happy to help him
He plays me SLICE OF HEAVEN on the PA and the customers
are dancing in twos and fours before the song has ended
DAH DAH DAH BOOM BOOM Lotsa girls around
I take a breath Drink a longneck Lion Red Next it’s SIX
MONTHS IN A LEAKY BOAT and boy they’re swaying to this
one This is as good as it gets and Billy knows I’m peaking as he
slips through the crowd and whispers to me Boy This place is
one hundred percent pure See? This is godzone
The long white thing And I don’t remember for a while about
the booth I’m in or where I don’t know where I am or all the
broken horses around me I laugh with Billy The bar is full of
lovely people and the bartender is smoking a cigar We all light
up and in the thick atmosphere we become billionaires HOW
BIZARRE is playing on the PA now and Billy takes the stage
He’s swinging his hips around and suddenly a mid 30s telesales
recruitment agency’s junior executive liaisons officer starts a chant
in the crowd GO HARD GO HARD FUCK YEAH FUCK YEAH
he sings And we all sing Going harder than a turtle’s
shell Harder than that hard volcanic rock Hard as Christmas
with your family Screaming happy foam from our mouths in big
spit bouquets Everyone’s alight Everyone dreaming
No one’s sick No one dead
After I cum I leave the booth right to the beat of the bedroom clock
and it’s dinnertime Billy’s served me several carrots and a scallop
on a little plate beside my bed that retracts after I take the grub from
it and scoff it down in one big gulp I’ve earned it
I’ve earned this
I will learn to fight I don’t want to survive but I will
Learn to fight

* * *

On the outside I once had a particularly sweet job as a waiter in a
place that didn’t serve anyone It was good I was happy
The boss let me drink all night I just had to take some people
into a room down the hall and then I could have a drink
And they had all sorts of drinks Different syrups and fruits
Different types of bourbon and schnapps Bitters and spices
Mixed citrus I learned every drink on the menu and never served
a single one of em Had imaginary conversations with strangers
and heard about their lives Served up a mean old fashioned
A bitter martini with brandy A coke for the little one I gave
great speeches And then they’d come out the room around three
or four in the morning and I’d smile and say good stuff guys good
day to you all and a fine day it’s becoming And they’d pat me on
the shoulders and say you’re a legend mate and how was it this
evening? And I’d say all things considered it was pretty quiet but
look I put some good legwork in And then they’d shake my
hands and kiss my cheeks and say I was a good one
A solid bloke No issues with him, they’d say to my boss
He’s a keeper The boss agreed
All the drinks had levelled me after a few years in that place
I bought cocktail equipment for my flat on this hill behind East
Papamoa’s lifestyle blocks Some locals called it a shack but it was
better than that Had an ice maker Sixteen types of bitters
Longest long-drop in New Zealand I spoke to people on
the phone late at night and wished them well and worse with my words
Grew tobacco Some people came to see me some evenings
Sometimes a woman I made drinks for them all But no lager
or white wine here, I warned them
There was a beehive in the garden and I let it go on buzzing until it
stung my mother one night She was visiting from Tuakau and
trying to stay off the scratchies The next day I went after the hive
with a can of bugspray and a lighter Strapped on an armour of
newspaper and duct tape Wrapped my face in wet bandages
Approached it slowly Shook the can Lit the lighter Let rip
Watched the burning bees trying to make it out alive Scorched
bees piled up on their babies inside the honeycomb tunnels
Little caterpillars I thought Only they’re bees
I kept going with the spraycan Torched them all Got stung a
few times but destroyed the hive Crunched a carpet of crackling
shells on the lawn with my gumboots Thought to myself that’s a
job well done well made and well served good sir
Made myself a rum and avocado shake Crawled into my bed
Picked the stingers out of my neck Peeled the bandages back
Got stung a few more times I called out into the phone book
ARE YOU LISTENING I gathered up the stingers with some
tweezers Put my head under the sheets
Listened to their bodies buzzing on the table
All the maintenance round that rental place had done my head in by
2010 or so when I up and left to muck around for a bit
Went to Timaru Picked apples near Napier Got a job on a
boat watching waves Made friends with foreigners on the road
No scams for a long while Learned more about the internet in
places where you’d pay to play their computers for a certain length of
time I took half days off work in these places and it was worth
it Packed a lunch Flask of something slippy Got a Youtube
channel and a Facebook page Was reading the papers a lot
All that corruption business Wasn’t sure about much
Made sure to say that when I ranted Didn’t want to appear
overconfident You can say what you want about conspiracy
theories but with that many of them some must be true I reckon
I mean I was told once that some stars have died years ago but we
still see their light and we will for years to come Not that it’s
relevant to corruption of course But it is interesting to know
In a caravan you’re mainly free from rates and things but the odd
noble citizen will tell you to move along They’re some of the
worst The worst spats I had I don’t move along for
strangers Especially rich ones who like to tell you this and that
about morality in their sports cars and people movers full of
purebred children Well I say it’s still a freer life in a caravan
Though anything else seems free now And I tend to think more
about those people I met on the road Remember things I didn’t
resolve with them Arguments I couldn’t win Times I got too
drunk to be with people but I let them in anyway I always
remember different peoples’ vehicles Amy’s car was a wreck
Paul drove a donkey Gaz had a nice one courtesy of the job
Mine was a Toyota Red alopecia bonnet Wasn’t particularly
special but it got me from A to B Only problem was I kicked the
muffler off it in a rage last September when this surfer prick in a
pickup cut me off in the carpark of Pak’n’Save in Ashburton and I
ran aground on the roundabout The sky was purple

* * *

Had a chuckle with Tig We pretended to be on TV
So Bitch how’s the scene inside Milk Island is productivity at an all
time high are those prisoner scums being turned into ratepayer
citizens is it all a success financially and how is weather in them
prisons
Well Tig I’d say I’d say things are all a treat as it goes things are
looking up people are happier wealthier better off and the exports
are a-flowing and the dollars are piling up in big stacks like this is a
movie about drug dealers and as for the dirty rabble of rapists well
they’re off to clean our streets and all them murderers will become
the bouncers outside your new soft house pub right down there on
the quaint square next to the local muff motel and all the glorious
statues of Jono and Bill’s cock
Well Bitch that’s a jolly good thing to hear how fine how dandy
please tell me a little more about how you’re turning these animals
back into people I mean out on the savannah there it’s quite hard to
turn an antelope into a lion isn’t it mate?
You raise a good point dear Tig and you have a sound mind and a
solid intellect if I may say so not to mention your muscles well look
you can’t so much make a badger from a beaver but what you can do
is to show these savages that there’s money in work right there’s a lot
of money in making them levers turn and that rotation keeps on
coming don’t it and look let me tell you mate they are bloody up for
it in down there on Milk Island they just love those cows
Bitchy Bitch with the true facts there folks now let’s hope you all
vote on our online poll who is the best Sir Richie McCaw or the
latest Pope and which one of them would you rather fucked your
perfect children this Friday night when you’re all out on the town
sucking breezers and playing fucken pony with your office mates ok
ok ok well Bitch tell me about the Americans mate what’s their deal
or what’s their problem or whatever
Well look I couldn’t tell you a whole lot Tig because I haven’t been
to the America myself but they do make some fine television don’t
they and that anthem is known all around the world so they’re doing
something right plus back in god knows when they elected a black
president which was a nice gesture given how much they fucked
them up back in the day now as far as Milk Island goes I would have
to say that America has to be bloody chuffed with all the new
cheeses thus far and I would definitely wager that there’s a lot more
money going to be stacked up in suitcases and travel bags and the
like if they just keep at it I mean god knows we Kiwis love to work
hard don’t we
I agree Bitch and I mean in terms of America DUDE WHERE’S
MY CAR is a fine piece of cinema isn’t it and you really saw that in
how much we Kiwis loved that film and others like it
It sure is Tig and what an example FRIENDS set for the world
asking are you enough like Joey in a crisis or are you gonna be a
Ross about economics and now look mate the commercial break is
coming but boy oh boy I just wanted to say how thrilled we are to
be here aren’t we Tig because now life might look a little bit
pointless might even look like dying is pretty awesome but who’s
pulling them levers eh it’s us mate it’s us and we make it all tick we
are the mechanism the machine and we make it move and we get it
lit like the coal in the fire don’t we
Bitch we sure do and now I’m just going to take a moment to
remove this tie right off my chequered Oxford collar office dress
shirt and just tie it up right here on this studio light ok and don’t
stop the show ok don’t pull us off the air I just want to show our
viewers how happy we are ok how good it’s going and just to thanks
America and her majesty for all of the cake
OK well Tig you just go ahead and tie that tie around the light and
do what you need to do for our live audience now look I’m just
going to thank our sponsors so thank you Jesus thank you the
Mighty Ducks thank you Great Gatsby and The Unknown Soldier
and Ross and Rachel and most of all our finest friends the Sensible
Fuckers and the Federated Cunts thank you muchly
Thanks Bitch and fuck you all I hope you die in a fire
Fuck you all indeed Tig

* * *

As a youngun I had some good ideas Wasn’t bright
Teacher said I had instinct though Liked history but preferred
sleeping Stayed up too late at home with the talkshow hosts
laughing at the band But I knew a good scam from the get go
Saw the other kids at primary scoffing lollies from the dairy paying a
dollar a mixed bag Thought I could provide it cheaper
Got hooked up at ten with a local confectioner who sold to the
dairies Nice bloke Smart bloke Sold me squishy planes
and chocolate fish by the kg and never charged me interest
By thirteen I was raking it in on the schoolyard They’d see me
coming Hear the candy rattling round in my lunchbox Queue
up outside the sickbay Made enough money to buy a skateboard
Alien Workshop Matty Helm broke it down the bowl after he
couldn’t do a boardslide on it I tried to stab Matty but his mates
broke my arm It got worse as I got older Selling crushed up
Panadol outside the Christian raves down in Wellington
Making money on cash returns and bathtub vodka First time I
took a boat I was seventeen Never loved the sea but riding
above it was fine Saw some other countries for a while
Bought tobacco from the locals and sold up to the wharfies Aged
quickly after that Too many hidings Thought I had the bug at
one stage Turned out to be scurvy
I speak out loud now Yeah I’m not proud of me No one
is But saying these words Feels better somehow Trying to
remember the old days Before I fucked it up Wouldn’t change
much that happened to me tho Would you Better to just be
here now Better to be real than imaginary I don’t own the
future I don’t have life insurance No dependents for me
My number is sixteen ten nineteen seventy nine offence bracket C
and collar tag two four eight two four Life’s a breeze
Lying here in the dark Thinking about what I done
Like they want me to

* * *

Splayed out baby in its crib Naked
Shitting pissing spewing into the chute
Eating Wanking Crying
Chatting to Billy
I’m a parasite with big greedy eyes Round the cups round the
cups Take the cluster ignore the cramps Don’t eat fast
Walk slow Drink a lot of water Talk your problems away
The daylight hour is precious Sun and slaughter the tough old
milkies A sandwich to pretend it’s springtime
What’s the news Billy? A big one give up, he says All the
soldiers in the fleet All them flags on awnings Somewhere
going to end badly Cockroach running town but the blizzard
going to escape him, he says
It’s useless talking to Billy sometimes
Naked baby lay back in crib Debate spending ten as Sims
onscreen My boy’s going to college Or
I could take another shit maybe It doesn’t matter
Naked Search my body for the tag Armpits Balls
Bellybutton Asshole Find new hairs on my back
Tug them out The tag is in me somewhere Lights go out for
sleepy time and the screaming starts Fag has got a new one
I ask Billy the whys and the whens but he just has a giggle
Speak Just speak, he says Keep speaking
And tell the truth The truth, I said
But
I can’t remember what I told myself it was

Milk Island was launched in June 2017 by Lawrence and Gibson.
You can read our conversation with Karen Healey and Rhydian Thomas about speculative fiction, escapism, and why literary fiction can be so fucking boring.